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Try the Elimination Diet

Eliminating these things from your life will have a massive positive effect on your future success and happiness.

Most of you reading this believe you are about to read a handy-dandy, quick way to lose weight. After all, I am a physician and I am supposed to provide you that. Right? Haven’t you heard interviews with docs? We usually say things as, “I love to take care of people.” Well, I guess I’m about to come out of the closet because I really don’t like to take care of people. Surely, there are times when people need to be taken care of, and then it is deeply gratifying to come to one’s aid. But, the majority of the time, most people need to be shown and guided in ways to take care of themselves. And that is what I love to do.

In my career, I have observed a few things. One of the most profound is that illness rarely arises out of the blue. It is usually the culmination of a string of poor lifestyle choices; really, bad habits. When we think of bad habits though, we usually think in the terms of those that involve eating habits or various forms of substance abuse. However, the bad habits that I find have the most profound effects on our health are the daily, recurrent diets of anger, regret, resentment, guilt, blame, and worry. These are the root causes of all other bad choices.

There is a portion of our brain, what I have dubbed the Automatic Brain (AB), which is responsible for these six feelings/emotions and the fight-or-flight reaction to danger that causes them. Eliminating them from your life will have a massive positive effect on your future success and happiness. 


As I have written before, The Elimination Diet: “Remove anger, regret, resentment, guilt, blame, and worry. Then watch your health, and life, improve.”

1. Anger

Pent up anger can lead to self-destructive behaviors or explode in overt hurt to others (ever hear of road rage?). But it is important to know where anger arises. It is the fight of the fight-or-flight reaction and it always means you are reacting to a perceived danger, threat, or vulnerability. It should never be believed or trusted as an actionable guide. To eliminate it, you must first explore why you feel threatened; in other words, what is at the core of your rage? Do you feel one-upped by a life circumstance; such as money challenges, relationship pressures, unresolved childhood abuses?

2. Regret

Happy or sad, at least we know what the past gave to us. It is known; the experiences and feelings, familiar. Regret is our ABs attempt to fight or flee the discomfort of present challenges or future unknowns. It is a powerful emotion that can freeze us in depression and despair. To understand that the past does not have to predict the future is to begin eliminating this feeling.

3. Resentment

Years ago, I was faced with a confrontational challenge. If I said nothing I would be sick with resentment for years to come. If I confronted the individual, I too would be sick, with nervousness/anxiety, but it would end once I addressed what needed to be addressed. Avoiding a confrontation provides a short-term gain, but results in the long-term pain of resentment. To eliminate this, you will need to learn about what it takes to be assertive. This means allowing the short-term pain of addressing a challenge, so to achieve the long-term gain of eliminating resentment. Being assertive removes the resentment that develops when you do something that you really do not want to do so to avoid the pain of sticking up for yourself. It is very different from being aggressive. Learn the difference and begin the elimination process.

4. Guilt

One of the greatest subconscious dangers that the human brain detects is that of the potential of losing security, often misinterpreted as losing love. Usually, the individual provoking the guilt feels in danger of losing the love of the recipient…you! Your guilt actually has nothing to do with you. Since our ABs will do whatever it takes, by all means necessary, to fight or flee losing security (our innate defense), that person will use guilt-producing language and behavior whose aim is not to lose you. Sometimes it is instituted as a means to be in control; to one-up. Understanding that the guilt is not really your guilt, but based on an arbitrary/manipulative set of rules usually established by someone else, can help to eliminate it. 


5. Blame

Your AB will cause you to fight or flee anything that it detects as dangerous, threatening, or circumstances where you feel vulnerable. In other words, it tries to “protect” all aspects of you. The idea that you need to accept personal responsibility and exert more self-control is a hard pill to swallow and can lead to negative opinions of yourself. Maybe you view your gifts as inferior to others. Your AB rejects those negative opinions because they imply vulnerability. Therefore, the fight-or-flight shows up as blame or scapegoating. That pesky brain of ours will cause you to look for blame in things that are out of your control to protect your sense of self. “I’m the way I am because it’s in my genes, or because I have a hormonal problem, or because I am big-boned.” Or, even worse, you’re in the predicament you’re in because of a certain group of people. These are the flight reactions your AB creates to the perceived danger of lacking self-control, of being weak.

6. Worry

The only purpose our AB exists is to protect us from perceived danger. The inherent danger for all animal species, including humans, is the unknown. No matter how hard we try, we can never know precisely what the future will hold. In order to prepare for this unknown of the future, we usually conjure up worst case scenarios which manifest in the form of worry. This ill-fated attempt actually makes us less prepared, as the anxiety it causes disrupts our sense of balance. By attending to present challenges in decisive ways, we better our chances at a danger-free future. When of my favorite Zen parables ends with the lesson, “When you have one eye on your goal [the future in this case], you only have one eye on the path [the present] in which to find the way.” Focus on your daily steps and forge a strong, worry-free path toward your future.

A final note:

When you target these six and make a concerted effort to rid them from your life, I promise you, it will work better than any diet, vitamin, or medication to move you into a state of health of mind, body, and spirit. I am often asked how one might achieve this elimination process. For that, I have developed a ten-step program to help you.

Visit my site to learn more!

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Charles F. Glassman

Dr. Charles F. Glassman, aka Coach MD, is a medical doctor, thought leader, & author who has learned that true holistic care arises when we balance mind, body, & spirit.

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PRABHAKAR RAJARAPU
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PRABHAKAR RAJARAPU

AMEN OK I DO AS YOU SAY THANK YOU

IonePalmer
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IonePalmer

Quite interesting and I believe this diet will certainly have a positive effect in my life and I intend to give a concerted effort to follow his advice.

NancyHurley
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NancyHurley

Your discussion about Guilt has finally opened me up to the freeing myself from a 25 year plus freeze on my life. I have ‘lived’ with female members of my family who use(d) guilt as the basis for our relationship so I would take care of them when they needed to take responsibility for themselves and their actions. Their message was “I can’t take care of myself – you have to do this or you are a bad, spoiled child.”
Reading this a lot has fallen into place especially your line – ‘Your guilt has nothing to do with you.” I finally get it!!! It’s about their manipulative wording to me to provoke me into taking care of things, responsibilities they need to deal with on their own.
Thank you for opening up my life back to me.

Fran Merkh
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Fran Merkh

Being brutally honest before God does the same things you’re speaking of. Who but God can change feelings from one minute to the next were you get up from your knees and with the fruits of the Spirit face the day with New perspective. That’s what it means when the Bible says He takes us from faith to faith. I’m sorry that I’m not sorry for inner rage, hate, negativity is my first step. Brutally honest before God of my intent of heart and agreeing with Him it’s not His way or will, is the single attitude changing intent of heart, my want tos become different

Sue Smith
Member
Sue Smith

Thank you for sharing this article with all of us Dr. Charles! It is refreshing to see a doctor who understands how much our emotions affect our physical health too! In your opinion, do our positive emotions have a positive affect also?

Akiroq Brost
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Akiroq Brost

Working on my mental well-being has helped me more than any diet or exercise program ever had. I can cope with things much better, I can push further, I have more energy. When you really think of it, how much energy is used on anger, regret, resentment, guilt, blame, and worry? What if we use that energy in more constructive ways? I found for me personally learning to love myself more helped me to let go of these negative mindsets. I feel so much more at peace in my day to day life. I believe that peace primarily stems from being at peace with myself. I can then extend that peace to others with great compassion. Great article Charles, thank you. <3

Jackie Wilushewski
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Jackie Wilushewski

Love this! I caught myself reading the title and thinking directly of the food/diet relationship. This Mental diet article has me feeling on fire right now! Thank you! I have dealt with each of these emotions and I am in total agreeance that being able to eliminate these in the long term negative affecting ways is a great pathway to a happy and full life experience.
Your paragraph on resentment is an absolutely wonderful way of how my thought process works in Life in general (no trust with resentment) with the whole spectrum of thoughts, feeling emotions. Not to say that I do or condone just blurting out anything and everything all day every day, just in general keeping this as the par to the mindset.
Thank you! Loved, loved, and loved this article @coachmd.

*sharing*

Robina fazal
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Robina fazal

Nice..article!Sir Charles F.Glassman…Positive thoughts are the key for a better,healthy,fresh and prosperous life…As much one has the capacity to resist things and others behaviours..and own patience towards…any negative thoughts…one can lead a life…with a healthy.. body mind and Soul…which will lead a person to be more Strong and healthy physicaly and mentaly and life can be powerful and amazing…Society needs such persons who can make life purposeful ….healthy and resistable so the whole society can get benefits… ❤💐

Jel Angco
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Jel Angco

We need to eliminate all these as fast and as early as we can as these are blinding us from the beauties in our lives.

Everybody makes mistakes.
Nothing is perfect even events and circumstances in our lives.
So let’s not allow anything/ anyone to dull our shine 💟

Miguel Dellinger
Member
Miguel Dellinger

You dont have to let anyone dul anything. I have no doubt, when you stop for a very short ‘moment’ all you will feel and all you will see is that YOU are The Shine. YOU are the biggest LIGHT ever possible.

Lalie Nietol
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Lalie Nietol

Hello Dr.Glassman, Bryant and Jenni💕 thank you for the great tips🤗 #3 (resentment) reminds of a situation around 15 yrs ago wherein i made a letter to my 3 officemates to express my feelings regarding some misunderstanding and resentment that was starting to build up on me. In asserting myself and by using diplomatic words, the situation and relationship improved. It was a win-win situation for all of us. Why not apply the same technique now? It really is important to get rid of these harmful emotions otherwise they will destroy you. Thank you.

Miguel Dellinger
Member
Miguel Dellinger

Lalie. Indeed the mark of a most beautiful light well done. You are proof we need not be afraid of anything nor anyone. That light within, that power and that beauty guided you and no doubt will continue to do so and sharing like this guarantees the path. Well done!

Ruth
Member
Ruth

I grew up in an abusive dysfunctional household. I was verbally and physically abused. It was my mom’s way or the highway. When little I learned to be still and very quiet so I did not get in trouble. My dad was seldom home due to work and being active in community. My mom was very unstable. She herself had a very abusive childhood where she was abused much worse both physically and sexually to the point of leaving home at 14 years old to escape the abuse. Her mom was morbidly obese. My mom associated being fat with being mean, selfish and lazy. She swore none of her kids would be fat and that she would never be fat. She decided that I should not weigh more than 125 pounds at 5’9. I would be limited to 1,000 calorie diets. I would be told I was lazy and lacked self discipline and maturity. I would be told I was selfish. I had to weigh in once per week. If I gained weight I would be punished by not being allowed to eat the entire day. If caught sneaking food I would be punished severely. She would force me to jog outside by chasing me with a yardstick and even get my father to joun in on the abuse and tell me that at 140 pounds I was fat. I had to learn to persevere at a young age. I swore I would not treat other peopke tge way I was being treated. My father was considered an outstanding member of the community so it was difficult for me and oher members of the family to report the abuse because no one would believe us. I was invited to a youth encounter event at a young age. It was there I learned I was lovable and valuable. I kept hope and faith. I made the most of it while still at home. I learned to have grattitude and to count my blessings. I would remind myself that the way my mom treated me and encouraged my dad to also treat me had nothing to do with me. I believed in God’s strength that he provided me. At 18 I joined the US Air Force. My mom did not believe I would make it. She thought I lacked the disciplne. But I believed in me and I did make it. I served in Hawaii and those were some of the best years of my life. See regardless of what happens to us we are responsible for our own hearts and our own happiness and well being. It is our responsibility to find ways to heal ourselves. We have all been damaged in our lives. But never lose faith nor lose hope. You are worth loving. You are worth loving yourself. Never give up. Take back your power. Do not repeat the abuse on others.

Sue Smith
Member
Sue Smith

Thank you for opening up and sharing your story with us Ruth. We are so proud of you and all your growth and accomplishments! Keep reading all the amazing articles here for continued inspiration and encouragement! Sending you Royal Love! 👑💖

Janice Wayne
Member
Janice Wayne

Absolutely wonderful article ! There are so many reasons that we can’t loss or gain weight and your article hit them all. The one I feel we need the most tools on is the one on how to deal to with our emotions. It all starts with self help. Thank you and I look forward to reading more of your article.

Ana B.
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Ana B.

I recently read a book called “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz (short reading yet very powerful) and it has been helping me a lot. I will go ahead and share with you the first agreement, “Be impecable with your word”. Words can have a very strong impact on how you make others feel, and most importantly, how you feel about yourself. Our mind is like a garden where we can cultivate positive or negative thoughts, we can not let words hurt us.
Another book I recommend reading is “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari” by Robin S. Sharma this books is trully inspiring and also talks about being in control of our mind by not allowing anything that could harm us “grow in our garden”.
It also talks about meditating, having daily contact with nature, and raising with the sun, so we can have a “healthier” mind, body, and soul; by dopting the techniques mentioned in this book we can avoid feeling the way the article explains and be able to live a fuller and happier life. Our fears and limitations are set by ourselfs and no one else; we can break those barriers and enjoy life the way it was meant to. 🙂

Helen
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Helen

As I was born my life was mapped out by the destructive behaviour of my parents whom never taught me any capabilities to deal with emotions and situations brought on by those that have been listed in this article I exist only in a way that protects me from how I feel from the chaos around me I step out of myself look to a more beautiful world in my mind I float from this chaos and drift into a more safe place for me to feel calm and happy unfortunately as they say it is a gift to be an empathic i still have this urge to want to hold onto the people that are in pain I cannot eliminate those feelings of empathy it’s that powerful to put me in exhausted state

Randy Morrissey
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Randy Morrissey

This comes at a very good time for me. I have just ordered the books and look forward to receiving them. Currently we are in the midst of my brother’s trial whom was killed by an impaired driver and looking forward to the closure that comes with it. In the course of going through this ordeal and the many emotions involved I decided to get counseling to help put me in the life I want and deserve rather than the one I have led for sixty five plus years. The elimination diet appears to me to be one of the answers I need. My life is on an upward swing because of choices I’ve made and the elimination diet CA only help me be the best me I can be. Thank you

noureddine
Member
noureddine

Great doctor.,thanks.true a lot of négative thoughts affect our health physical and psychological .we all or at least most of us know those thoughts but we are or were not aware of how destructive were and are.they are part of our life.and if they were clothes no one one would wear them.fortunately there are the positive opposite in colour taste and smell to those negative thoughts.being always positive or at least most of it is an individual work which needs deep understanding to our selves and different situations of life.the best sometimes we can do is to moderate those negative thoughts through true faith for its eye can see better than of man.

Lawney
Member
Lawney

Emotions sure can have a big impact on your health. First step. Awareness. Thanks for this article. Very important information here.

Melissa
Guest
Melissa

I believe once people let go of all the negativity thats when they can truly love themselves. We also need to understand we cant change others, and not to blame ourselves for others actions. Men, and women alike can be very passive when it comes to love.

baya elbey
Member
baya elbey

thank you for your beautiful article so useful and benificial

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