Letting Go Of My Suffering

Greatness can only be achieved when we muster the courage to face the fear of the unknown.

When I speak of suffering, I refer to the constant emotional pains I felt in my heart and soul caused by a deep dissatisfaction with the way my life was evolving.

The outcome I experienced was not what I had dreamt for myself. I considered myself a good boy but my life was turning into a disaster. This pain was mainly due to the knowledge that I was not living in accordance to the dictates of my inner voice of reason. There was a horrific conflict between the lives I was living, as expressed by my decisions and actions, and the life I desired to live, as expressed by my honest intentions. This inconsistency brought about severe tensions and is what I refer to as spiritual suffering.

Unfortunately it seems like so many people are living with this internal conflict and they seem to have accepted it as the only way to live.

The world is designed in such a way that makes us lose touch with our true identity. From our upbringing, to our environment, to our schools, we are taught to conform to the pre-existing structure of the world if we are to survive. The economy of the world is ruled by corporations and because of that, people are trained all their life to be suited to work for these organizations. Nobody teaches us to be ourselves, and thus we grow up with this conflict between who we are and who the world wants us to be. People get used to living their lives this way because they have not known any other way of life.

I was stuck in a job that I hated and I was living a life that I knew wasn’t anything near my desires; in fact it was almost in opposite of what I knew I could do.

I had no passion and maybe no reason to continue living and I had resigned my fate to living a mediocre life whose meaning was in disagreement to the power that I felt inside. I was afraid to let go of my job and the comfort that it brought. If I left my job, where would I go to and where would I start from? This was the dilemma. Stepping out to pursue my passion and purpose was scary because I was not sure if I would survive. The main problem was that I was not even sure if my so called passion and purpose were real or just an imagination. Everyone I consulted told me to play it safe and remain where I was but I knew inside of me that I was living in constant dissatisfaction and spiritual torment.

The reason why we prefer to remain in our suffering rather than take the risk of venturing into the life we truly desire to live is based primarily on the fear of failure. Fear keeps us imprisoned in a world of pain, and for those who have financial responsibilities, the risk may seem too reckless, so they remain in their familiar world. This fear emanates from our false sense of self. Some people are not even aware that the voice they hear on the inside is their authentic soul crying to be released while others are scared to leave their comfort zone.

We must conquer this fear if we really want to live a life that will end with minimal regrets.

For most people, this fear is conquered when their lives come crashing down on them. It usually takes one form of great loss or the other to propel us out of our living hell. I lost everything I had before I realized that my life was empty and of no purpose. Everybody deserted me except for a handful of friends and family. My eyes opened to reality and I knew that I could not go back to living the way I used to. That was when I decided to journey inwards to my soul to discover who I really was and what I was meant to be doing with my life. When I let go of my suffering, I found my talents, passions, and purpose. Now, my life seems to be evolving happily with so much inner peace and joy.

Greatness can only be achieved when we muster the courage to face the fear of the unknown.

True happiness can only be achieved when we are able to express ourselves in all honesty and truth. Healing is only possible when we start living our authentic lives. The purest forms of humility, obedience and compassion are borne out of the most intense forms of sufferings. The lessons from my sufferings have brought out the best in me so far. Take the risk to be your authentic self and the universe will provide all you need for success.


Uchenna Ilo

Doctoral researcher (Innovation Management), Spiritual Thought Leader, Philosopher, Spiritual healer, Social Entrepreneur, Creative Writer, and Lover of Life.

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OMG I love these words ❤️❤️


Brilliant !! You have said it so beautifuly and truly…yes after following your posts and reading this article i can tell you that i too have conquered all the fears , the sufferings pains guilt which was consuming my energies my beliefs for decades has totally evaporated from inside….I had lost all hopes and i kept on doing everything for everyone then but now i am a new person with more confidence…thanks to you Uchenna for showing me the light and make me realise my worth, I have learnt to live again….a beautiful thing has happened recently in my life….this is giving me hope to live again, I am not afraid of any failure never was only i was a victim of the environment my surroundings of negetivity and toxicity… but i have firmed up myself and i soon would be stepping out of my past ….
I hope i will make it and taste my freedom….

Fatima Shahnaz Ahmad

What Darlene said!💝💝💝

Laurie Lankins Farley

I really enjoyed this. Neale always says,” pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice.” Great article.

Wong Lok

Dear Uchenna <3

Thanks a lot for writing this piece of encouragement article to help us face our fears and move past it. <3
Thanks to your inspiration i came up with an aphorism that is something like "Don't let death become your alarm clock because it would too late to wakeup to fullness of life. - Wong Lok." Somehow existential crisis is an alarm clock that is essential to wake us up, even this is a tremendous pain that we need to endure. we all experience pain in life but learning the pain is the medicine but not fully the pain. pain is an alarm clock, but if we dont get out of bed, we would still be having the suffering. And your encouragement and helpfulness to help others is why we can get out of our bed and thrive. woop woop. Have a super nice day and night.

much love and appreciation to you,

Catherine B. Roy

“Greatness can only be achieved when we muster the courage to face the fear of the unknown.” Brillinat! As always! Wonderful article. I’ve been there. Actually, partly I still am but working hard towards the change, since I’ve made a decision! Thank you for this beautiful article!


This hits home…..suffered a TBI in 2011. I am not the same cognitively, have vestibular issues and balance issues. It is the pain of grieving the old me vs the new me. Do I have challenges? Yes. Some days better than others. You know though I am warrior strong! I will continue to be that way as well.


This hits home…living with TBI since 2011. So many unknowns and fears in not being the same person I was prior to my injury. Cognitive skills, vestibular issues, balance issues… take them all for granted. I have to push through things that are so very uncomfortable.
I am warrior strong!

Dianna Weaver
Dianna Weaver

Suffering brings out the best in all of us. When people ask… why then? If there is a God does he allow for so much suffering? I believe from my own experience that suffering is the birth of blessing. I have learned so much from having lived a difficult life. I am who I am today because of it and though I have a lot to do still – I know I am on the right track so to speak. I’ve been forced to evaluate my surroundings and myself. You can’t run or hide from life – it eventually forces you to face it one way or another. Wish I had known that as a kid – maybe could have saved myself the bumpy ride it took to get here. When I meet people who have overcome great fears and found joy behind the curtains of the unknown I am in awe. Thank you for sharing your words I found them inspiring. I have no intention of allowing fear to prevent me from mustering up courage to conquer – to be successful in 2018. Success means new things to me today after learning from so many of you – your articles, your videos – My final article was yours for the day before heading to bed. What a good one to land on – Success for me will be conquering fear. Might take me several tries in a day, redo’s on the regular, a lifetime of enduring but I’d like to beat fear entirely one day.

Sarah Capehart
Sarah Capehart

“…we are taught to conform to the pre-existing structure of the world if we are to survive.” Such a tragedy to think about. Many of us never even have the thought to question anything that is. I was just talking about this in regards to education. Yes Uchenna, we MUST find the courage to face our fear of the unknown. Challenge everything you think you know! A beautiful life is ours to live; the world is nothing but ours to design.