“Remember to create a space for others at your table this holiday season and create your own big magic. Raw and honest.”
A familiar wave of dread came over me as I stared at my calendar.
Only one week away… Those surrounded by loved ones and friends during the holidays cannot understand the intensity of this feeling.
The holiday everyone was hustling to prepare for and I just wanted to buy a plane ticket and skip town. Two thousand miles from family, many passed this year and now, in a city that is still new to me.
My heart sank as I considered our options.
The kids were with our ex’s and everyone we knew was planning their own family holiday. Many couples are just like us.
In casual conversations, I’d repeated, “Yes, it’s just David and me this year. A little sad without the kids and family so far away.” I might as well have screamed, “Please invite us to your holiday! I’ll do the dishes!” I went so far as posting on social media that we were in town and “free to crash your holiday”. We are fun and I do dishes! There should SERIOUSLY be a waiting list of people demanding we show up! I laughed half-heartedly at the silence that followed…
Growing up in a home where the two biggest most anticipated days of the year were Thanksgiving and Christmas, I knew what I was missing. A long table filled with family. The laughter. The energy. The love. And, I could for just one day pretend like I belonged.
Now, in a new city and staring at the damn calendar.
I fought off the tears that no one would understand but me. Friends around the world, but in this town, still a bit of an outsider. Another grownup moment where I would have to create my own “big magic”.
I took a breath and considered who might need family and friendship more than me and made the phone call. Once again uncomfortable. Putting myself out there to lift, love, and serve offers. For a moment, I had forgotten that this is from where all good things manifest.
This holiday will be about something bigger than my disappointment.
It will be about creating space at MY TABLE instead of hoping that the world will create a space at theirs.
Remember to create space for others this season at your table.
It might mean the world to someone. And, I promise you that it will lift YOUR spirit as much as it lifts theirs.