In the same way every animal finds its way into a trap, people sure-footedly step toward normalcy to survive. The opposite of self-realization is being realized, or made real, by the standards of outside force or influence. If you are not creating yourself, then an imposed ‘self,’ is being created for you. When you are not building yourself as the creator of your own life, you are being built, into the image and likeness of your cultural creator. Without individuation, your identity is the collective. Common, conventional, mainstream, and normal — these are the states of the aborted individual; the unborn in mind, faculty, awareness, and self-knowledge. They are commonly called sleepwalkers, zombies, the status quo, and the masses, but in reality, it is each of us to one degree or another. The real question is how much of the actual you, are you ever going to experience? Experiencing yourself is your life purpose. You experience nothing, but yourself. Every so-called experience, relationship, connection, pain, passion, feeling, thought, sense, and emotion, is a sublimation of life’s grand transmission upon the canvas of you experiencing yourself. If you are not steeped in the ecstasy of experiencing yourself, then you have never fully lived. For, the only true anxiety of life is to be severed from life, by being severed from self.
Anxiety is intrinsic to life because the current social construct is such a fraud. In order to play the fraudulent game of modern life, one must assume an unnatural and fraudulent role; the role of an anti-human. Anti-humanism comes in the form of forced structures of consistency, social protocols, and rules of emotional conduct, which are utterly alien to beings as inconsistent, momentary, emotional, and impulsive as human beings. Each person is bound tightly in a behaviorally isometric strait-jacket of contradictions; a psychic contortion that leaves the hobbled soul jittering between impossible and unnatural forms of human being. The goodly and civil role is an anti-human posture, where the wild untamed soul is splayed upon the mental rack, like medieval torture, to bend and shunt the frighteningly splendid phenomenon of a free form soul, into an unnatural state, to thereafter be called, natural. This is how we become, and live the life, of the unnatural natural. Alan Watts’ speaks to the spirit of the unnatural natural in his “social double-blind game,” of which, “the first rule of this game is that it is not a game”, with further contradictory rules, such as, “everyone must play” (or else), and, “be yourself, but play a consistent and acceptable role,” and “control yourself, but be natural,” and, “try to be sincere.” Our fraudulent “real life” is an M.C. Escher-like impossible staircases into higher and more peaceful states of consciousness for individuals and society, for the rules of this game, are unsolvable puzzles, that keep us all in a constant state of anxiety.
To escape our anxiety we must accept, and make peace, with the contradictions of life. Though not commonly considered, there are many non-fiction applications of suspension of disbelief, especially in a false world of illusions. Suspension of disbelief is a vital life skill for anyone who wants to live in the real world. By suspending disbelief we can believe in ourselves. We can and should begin to accept imagination as a part and form of reality, because human reality is inseparable from imagination. We can live life as broader spectrum beings, with the best qualities of children, by healing our affliction of adultism, which severed us from communing with our vast inner-child. Your inner-child, like the truly natural newborn; a sort of aboriginal proto-human of consciousness — unbound and god-like, is born into a cultural cocktail of sedation, constriction, and programming, often called, love. Natural curiosity and playful interface of innocence, only forgivable as a child, is what is seen in adults as hedonism, or insanity. The true loss of innocence is when freedom becomes shameful, and shame becomes freedom. We accept the mantel of shame in order to transition into the adult life of freedom. This is how we trade inhibition for tradition. This is how we lose ourselves. All loss of power begins with shame, and suppression of what is deemed bad in our nature.
What society hates and fears most is nature and truth, especially when observed in people. True authenticity creates a state of jeopardy and danger for that individual, forcing them to hide in resentful conformity. This is how inauthenticity creates bitterness in the individual, and ultimately in the culture. The loss of true identity creates a lifetime of pain. All human derangements and fractures begin with the loss of self — a loss no amount of grieving can heal. Numbness becomes the new life for those de-spirited by culture. They have been cultured — destroyed and reborn into the new life, where only the unnatural is desirable, for the unnatural feels safe and familiar, for they are unnatural. They have been remade in the image and likeness of falsity; their true God. But the truth aches in their forbidden places and grieves them with a nagging malaise of uncertainty and unbelonging.
The ultimate falsehood, to the great lie of the false life — is truth. Anything which points to the real and ultimate freedom is labeled profane and illicit. And so, bondage shall be called freedom, and falsehood called truth, and evil called good — and this inverted reality keeps the secret to your liberation hidden in plain sight; in moral certainty, where none will dare look. This is why it is important to question things and ask “why?”, but most importantly, question yourself. Challenge yourself. Be defiant; defy yourself. Challenge authority; the authority of your own rational convictions!
Meditation can put you in touch with your less strictured and structured self; to glimpse the source of your true power and formless state. Your profane and complete self, your truth, is a disassembly of the anti-human persona, only slightly visible as you submerge through the layers of abstraction by releasing thought, as an act of wilful dissociation, toward controlled insanity. Meditation allows you to visit your aboriginal forbidden places and return with artifacts of wisdom unknown in the common culture. From Joseph Conrad to Joseph Campbell, this journey and return; a dipping into the dark well of consciousness, is alluded to in allegory and with great explicitness throughout all literature. Your consciousness is an inner portal, through which you climb, to escape yourself.
Consider the possibility that your sense of purpose has been hacked and rerouted, to empower that which seeks to suppress your true purpose. Until you receive the revelation of your power, and free yourself, you will remain both captor and captive — as your own warden, in your own prison, for the rest of your life. The world will do everything it can to seduce you to go to sleep, and if you refuse, it will then try to strangle you. To keep your innocence and faith alive you have to kick and scream and fight. You have to protect the beauty within you, and fight for it, like protecting a small child from a predator. Mediocrity and apathy is that great predator; the status quo embodied by the sleeping masses.